Trick or Treat?

 Is this a trick or a treat? I find myself asking this question more and more. Let’s take a little Halloween trip around my haunted mind.

Yesterday I fell off my holy broom; only 2 sweeping days after my decision and public folly to give up caffeine! Do I even deserve to be blogging about personal development? Am I worthy? Am a crazy? Do you still love me? Who cares?

But I digress. Back to this intriguing inquiry of trick or treat. I pledged to give up coffee and caffeine. 2 days in my pure caffeine free life while hanging out with friends, I caved into temptation. I had a Black Widow Mocha in honor of Halloween. Very tasty with amazing powers of pondering.  I wonder what the heck they put in it? I drank it at 1PM and was still buzzing at 1AM Halloween morning.

While drinking the coffee with friends, we started carving the layers of pumpkin truth. First came a boost of energy as the coffee and sugar kicked in. Seems like a treat since my energy was lagging before the coffee. This wave lasted maybe an hour. Then I noticed a lagging of my energy, first in my body, then in my emotions. So let’s call this a trick. We started talking about taking care of our bodies and the impact of different things like food and water. I was swaying back to the treat side of things. Next I started feeling dehydrated, so back to tricks!

Was it caffeine or was it me? Discerning ghouls want to know. I drank 3 glasses of water, but couldn’t quench my thirst. This led to more discussion about sensitivity to food and environment. I was feeling like my sensitivity was a pain in the pumpkin patch. Bloody inconvenient when all I wanted was a little fun with friends. While listening to my friend, I lit up like a Jack-O-Lantern.  Sometimes my body comes alive when I hear something that is true or important for me. Aka Truth Tingles. No question I was enjoying the feeling of energy surging through my costume. My friends could see the goose bumps all over my arms. Let’s carve this up as a treat.

We ended up hanging out, playing Monopoly all afternoon. Thanks Avery! More treats. But I didn’t get to go hiking like I planned. The tricks are pulling ahead in this mad hatter dash. Later I took a gentle walk around my neighborhood at dusk enjoying the fall colors and smells. A definite Treat! After the walk, I was feeling shaky from not eating well. Boo ho. More tricks.

Even I could figure out this mystery. Time to feed the body beast a yummy treat! Later I was trying to write a blog, but couldn’t follow my pumpkin seed thoughts. More tricks. My evening was filled with flying ghouls and ghosts. I danced, I sang, I walked in the yard, I meditated, but the caffeine beast would not be tamed.

So I surrendered and read a book until almost 2 AM. Finally blessed sleep came, but I woke up feeling a little tired this morning. More tricks.

Ultimately I don’t have the final tally on whether caffeine tips the scale as a trick or treat. The humorous point is do we really know if something is good or bad? Maybe there is no bad as the mystics say. Or maybe the Zen idea that we can’t know until the end of life. Or maybe it isn’t about good or bad, labels, and categories. Maybe it’s a matter of surrendering; opening to fully experience life as it is. When I do so, it seems as though everything is benefiting me, though not always as I imagined.

May all your tricks and treats be hallowed!